you people need to stay away from me

friday morning for work we went to a town near moscow, idaho.
i was the only regular auditor to go.
all of the rest were supervisors.
so that made me kind of nervous.
and i guess i will never understand why i was picked.
on the way back from our job, we stopped off at a small grocery store where half the crew proceeded to buy liquor.
then we went to a smoke shop.
i was really shocked that we didn't stop by the cda casino while we were at it.
these people are supervisors.... and they are buying liquor on the clock!
but, one of the supervisors said she'd mention to the lady that makes the schedules that i want more hours.
i don't know if she will remember to tell her or not though. but it would be nice.

i worked my first grocery store today.
i liked doing it more than any other retail store i have done inventory at.
it was way easier to count and didn't require scanning anything.
i hope in the future they give me more to do.

so there is this artfest going on in my neighborhood with this little festival in cda park and roads closed off for live music.
and guess who had to walk a half mile from where she had to park her car to get to her apartment today?
instead of these people using the public shuttle to the event, they take up all of the residential parking.
needless to say, i'm peeved about it, and will be glad when it is over.

i have this nice big insect bite on my arm now.
at first i thought it was a mosquito bite, but i'm sure it's a spider bite now.
if it gets any bigger, i'll have to go to the hospital.
wouldn't you know... the one time in my life that i don't have health insurance to help.
hopefully it will go down and go away instead though.

there are seriously about 5-7 people on my friends list that are getting married really soon or JUST got married.
what's up with that?!
everyone decided summer of 2008 sounded good?
and then there are all the people on my list that have or will have babies in 2008.
it's scary... you people need to stay away from me. :P

mindless self indulgence was in town last night.
and i missed it... because i'm a broke bitch.
i probably wouldn't have went anyhow because i don't like to go to shows by myself.
but they would have been really nice to see for the 3rd time.
maybe next time.

i seriously can't be motivated to do anything.
if it can be put off, it will be... until the last possible moment.
there is a lot i should be doing. but i seriously just can't.
i need some serious positive motivation.
i should start drinking caffeine again.

sleep next to me

i was laying in bed with the dog listening to a folk music playlist mix i made quite awhile back.
it immediately brought back a memory of me listening to the same playlist with headphones at night.
i was listening to the mix rather loudly as i tried to sleep and drown out the cries of my new puppy in her cage next to my bed.
brandy was crying because it was her first time in a cage by herself and all she wanted to do was sleep next to me.

i wonder if it's a coincidence that my 2 favorite movies filmed in spokane are about mental illness.
i am starting to wonder.

i let someone so quickly into my life recently.
which was a mistake and i should have known it.
he left my life just as abruptly.
i feel like i was cheated.
but it's a lesson learned.
next time, i will be more hesitant ... even if it feels right.

i have been keeping in contact with my friend mickey via email a lot recently.
i can't wait to see him ... if he comes up here on his 2 week vacation.
he said his uncle just got back from vacation and spent 1500.00 in gas alone!
but he says he is taking a vacation no matter what. :)
i really should start thinking of things we could do while he is up here.
it would be kind of weird to meet him and be like... "well, do you want to go to jack in the box?"

i found out that if i were to get a second pet,
it would cost me an additional $150 non-refundable pet deposit.
weird thing is that she won't accept a check for it. only money order or cash.
she accepted checks for my last pet deposit and monthly rent.
i find this to be a little shady. so i will not be getting a second pet anytime soon after all.

celebrated sheena's birthday.
there will be a video on youtube soon of her doing the robot.
look for it.

practically stalking

i got my new RGIS schedule in the mail friday.
i have 11 new jobs through the 20th.
this schedule is considerably more than last months.
which is a very good thing...
but there are a couple in moscow, idaho again.
one of them requires me to drive there myself.
so i will probably tell them i cannot do that one.
i am not wasting 4 hours driving and my gas money to drive that far for something that will probably only take 4.5 hours in itself to do.
i just can't afford to do that.
i'll have to call the office and find out i guess.

friday and saturday we watched all episodes of it's always sunny in philadelphia from season 1 to 3.
it was good to have someone else to watch it with.

a creepy neighbor of mine was practically stalking us saturday.
he knocked on my door 3 or 4 times.
first time to borrow 10 bucks.
second time to know if we wanted a beer.
third time to see if he could hangout with us.
i think that's all.
i was surprised he didn't continue to keep coming by.
if i had been alone, i would have been slightly freaked out.
i might have made "friends" with the wrong neighbors, eh?
...but i have had far worse neighbors... so i shouldn't complain.

it has been decided that the next video i make will be of a big toe war.
similar to thumb war.. but with the big toe.
this will also involve one foot trying to tickle another person's foot.
sure to be mighty entertaining.
or not. we'll see.

i still have yet to go geo caching.
last weekend would have been perfect for it.
maybe in a couple of weekends i will give it a try.
it probably won't even be fun anyways.

i've been going through my old photo albums.
it's been decided that there are some photos i don't need anymore.
so i have been ripping up a lot of them today.
i need to order a bunch of new prints also.
so i will probably spend some time compiling a folder full of photos to order prints of.
i have been meaning to put together a new album for a long time.
it would be nice to have a few new framed photos as well.

i ordered 5 more books through paperbackswap.com.
i really, really need a bookcase or two.
i still have a tote of books in my car that i never unpacked.
then again, i have not read much lately anyways. :\

start wearing two pairs of socks

i can finally fit into my "skinny" jeans again.
i have only been able to wear them a couple of times in the last 4 or 5 years because they have been too small.

i have decided i want to ride a city bus.
i have never rode one...
but this is 2008... the year of big changes for me.
so i figured i should probably ride a bus.
i'm hoping to take one downtown on friday afternoon and walk around downtown for a bit and take pictures.

it's pretty bad when someone calls and leaves you a message for a job interview,
and then when you try to return their call,
they are busy all 7 times you attempt it.
apparently they don't want to interview me too bad.

i finally got the usps application in the mail.
i was starting to wonder if rita forgot about me!
it pays $12 an hour. not super great, but better than what i am making now.
plus it's part-time graveyard.
graveyard gets pay differential rate as well.
so i will get the lengthy application filled out and mailed back in by tomorrow.

i heard one of the other auditors comment today how physically demanding our jobs are.
i was glad to hear someone else bitching about it also.
i thought it was just me because i had not actually worked in a month.
i got new work shoes today... i had them ordered from a catalog.
and i don't like them now that i have them.
they slide up and down on my heel. :(
maybe i will just start wearing two pairs of socks or something.
they will be good shoes once they are broke in.

RGIS emailed me my pay stub for the last pay period.
that's kind of nice to know ahead of time how much money you will have... or won't.
my paycheck will be a little bit more than expected. so that's really good. :)

maintenance guy should be by tomorrow to finally fix my cold faucet in the bath tub and get me some bedroom blinds.
i also found out that i can put in my own a/c window unit if i want!
i'm kind of excited about that.
so in a few weeks i will probably look into getting one.

yay for getting my partylite candles in!
i was impatiently awaiting my porch lemonade candles.
mmm...
and the soaps are so nice i don't even want to use them!

there was a little half-siamese kitten on my fire escape outside my bedroom window this evening in the rain.



luckily, i found the cat's owner not too long after i found the kitty. :)
i was so close to growing attached to the cute little thing too.

amused... not assumed

well, my curiosity has been put to rest.
the irs finally issued me a notices stating how much and when i will receive my economic stimulus rebate.
i had never gotten one before stating i was due a rebate even though i filed taxes.
but finally i got the notice. so yay!
darn rebate it cutting it close.
i need it to help me pay the rent this month. eeck! :(

mom finally emailed me back and with pictures of their new home and whatnot.
so i guess she was not avoiding me, she was just busy.

doug is supposed to be getting married at the end of july.
but i guess no one thinks that's going to happen.
if it would a very good thing if it didn't happen actually.

this is really cute...

Puff Sleepin'


more random videos brought to you by me:



(should read : easily amused... not assumed.)

"ensure a good home"

things have been going incredibly well in all areas except financially lately.
but i am far from complaining.

i finally got ahold of rita at the post office about a job in processing.
she is going to send me out some information and application in the mail. :)
it's a part-time night shift job... but it should be decent.

i talked to my bestest retard friend mickey thursday.
we just played catch up on each other's lives.
i hadn't talked to him in a couple of weeks, so it was really nice.
he told me he is taking vacation in a couple of weeks and might be heading up this way!
i am SO SO SO excited!
for me to be able to see a friend from tulsa right now would just be awesome.
i hope that he can stay at least a day so i can show him around a bit.
but i guess that would require me knowing of cool places to go in spokane. lol
i must do some more research soon.

steph's party is sunday afternoon.
we haven't talked a whole lot about it.
i'm hoping she can get something worked out so that more guests can attend.
the last party i did was a huge flop.
but i think even the one after steph's will be good.
i talked to lynda today and she seemed very confident that she's gonna have a lot of guests.
and i will need to send her some post card invites out in the next day or so.

i sent mom another email on thursday since she never replied back to the last.
and still no reply to this email either.
either sometime is wrong... or she isn't willing to talk to me after all.
but i think if something was wrong, someone would have called me.

met steve at merlyn's downtown thursday.
that was more fun that i anticipated it being.
i think that's something i will want to do again soon.

i need to buy a fan really, really soon.
the apartment was super warm friday and today...
so any unnecessary moving made me break out in a sweat.
therefore, i did a lot of laying about.

i need to get my ass in gear and start getting more stuff done!
i just really haven't felt like doing anything at all this week unless i am forced to.
i keep thinking back to the days i worked 2 full-time jobs last spring and barely had time to sleep in between and wonder how i did it?

i am hoping to meet melissa tonight.
i have yet to meet her, but she seems pretty cool.
her 21st birthday is wednesday.
ahhh to be 21 again. :)

i want to get a second pet.
i've been looking on craigslist constantly,
but everyone wants a damn "rehoming fee" to "ensure a good home".
that's bullshit. people with money does not automatically mean they will love the animal and take care of it.
and just because i don't want to dish out $50-$100 for a pet,
doesn't mean i'm a bad person.
i either want to get a female chihuahua/chihuahua mix or a bunny.
if anyone living in the area, has any ideas on how i could adopt a cheap/free bunny or chihuahua let me know. :)

"who is this???"

the last several days have all kind of run together for me.
and i was kind of dropped back to reality today.
i have so much shit on my calendar that i need to take care of,
but keep putting off.
i feel kind of crappy.

i've spent entirely too much time drinking the last 4 or 5 days.
i am ashamed of myself.
because i am even drinking right now.
i think i drink mostly because i am stressed out about working.
but also so i won't feel so uncool when i go out.
drinking is like a nice little cushion sometimes.
because i feel bad about it now.
i've neglected a lot of stuff and i am probably also given a bad representation of who i am.
because no one here has known me much longer than a month.
and some... only a few days.
i am hoping that most people can see past that and see who i am.

but i'm not going to lie, the last several days have been fun.
whether i have been laying on the couch surfing the internet or at a karaoke bar i did not really want to be at.
i have great friends no matter how much drama is attached.
i am thankful for them.
because i really did not see myself meeting anyone here until several months down the road.

i VERY rarely mention such things in my blogs (if ever?),
but my heart is kind of fluttering for someone.
he's pretty awesome and i really do like him.
i just hope i don't regret posting this paragraph.

i have finally started catching myself missing home.
home being where my family and old friends are.
even though i hated it, i still miss it.
anyone that has moved a long distance from what they are used to can appreciate that.

my mom never replied back to the 2nd email i sent her.
that was a week ago.
i was hoping we could work towards rebuilding our relationship.
but it looks like maybe not?
i am considering sending another email just to see.
why don't i call her?
because we are not on those terms.
i would probably end up either very angry or crying.
i text messaged my sister for the first time in a couple of weeks today...
and she didn't even realize it was me.
she deleted my number from her phone.
that kind of made me feel HORRIBLE.
all i wanted to do was make sure that she was okay...
and she was like, "who is this???" :(

RGIS job is not proving itself to be much fun.
working only 1 to 3 times a week does not bring in much income.
i am starting to not mind the actual job so much,
but the work schedule is not very likable.
i will probably continue to work there until i find a job that conflicts with the RGIS schedule.

i almost still expect it to snow here.

you get pimps stopping in front of your house

it's nice to be able to open the windows in my apartment.
most people would over-look such a great advantage.
i've mentioned this to a couple people,
the house i lived in the last 2 years had all of the windows nailed shut.
due to the high crime rate.
so if i wanted to air out the house, i would have to open the doors.
...and when you open the doors, you get pimps stopping in front of your house looking in for new clients.
or crackheads that think since your front door is open,
you want to be their friend.
so yay for windows that open!!!!!

new job is okay.
did not get much training, so i bothered everyone all day with questions.
i am pretty sure they hated me after awhile.
first day was only 4.5 hours instead of like 7.
so that kind of sucks ass.
but everyone i worked with seemed nice enough.

mom has not emailed me in 4 or 5 days.
so i am wondering if my email to her was harsh or something?
i thought it was polite.
but apparently what i think and what it actually is, are 2 different things.

i think sometime really soon i want to have a get together at my apartment.
all guests will be forced to play uno with me!
that sounds totally awesome to me... any takers for this weekend???

alright, nap time.

peas are a wonderful vegetable

after contemplating recent events...
i decided to cave-in and get ahold of my mother.
it was just an email, but she did email back.
i hope that we can communicate like this for awhile without getting into another argument that keeps us not talking for another 5 months.

i finally dyed my hair. it was looking really bad.
and it honestly doesn't look much better now.

i've probably mentioned it like a half dozen times,
but i love jim gaffigan.



i was bored this afternoon, so i took a bunch of misc pictures with my isight, and compiled them into a narcistic video of myself. enjoy my retardedness.



peas are a wonderful vegetable.
you can add them to just about any food.

so wrong... but so hilarious

sometimes i wish i could be a better person.
it's hard for me to explain.
i care about people a lot, but sometimes i feel like maybe i don't care enough.
like, i put myself before others.
i can't allow myself to fall and fail because someone else did and i am trying to help them.
does that make any sense?
or maybe it's not a feeling of compassion,
maybe it's guilt.

i know i should not be writing about this...
but i have 2 friends that are in a seriously fucked up situation right now.
i want to help them so bad...
but how do you do that without fucking your own mind up?
i keep my distance, but i am there when called upon.
is that "good enough"?
i realize they are adults and need to figure their own shit out...
but it really sucks sitting on the sideline watching. :(

so my "orientation" for RGIS went well.
it was supposed to be a group thing, but i was the only one that showed up.
i think the other people must have gotten lost...
because it was a little difficult to find.

the human resources lady gave me an aptitude test.
i fucking kid you not, a mentally retarded person could have passed it.
all the test required was for me to COUNT items in each picture.
for instance, there was a picture of 12 cans of soup.
i counted 12 cans.
halfway through counting items on this test,
i started to wonder if the test was a joke. lol

the RGIS job sounds good. they've upgraded their inventory equipment since i last dealt with RGIS,
so it's much easier than it used to be.
the pay sounds okay. $8.50 to start, after 90 days pay raise based on performance, and then every 50 stores you work after that you get another raise/performance evaluation.
i go back in for training this tuesday before i go to CDA for partylite.
luckily RGIS is also willing to work around my schedule. :)
this almost sounds too good to be true.

i've started re-watching seasons 1-3 of it's always sunny in philadelphia.
it helps make me happy.
that show is so wrong... but so hilarious.